When I get to the edge of all the light I know
I choose to take a step forward
Knowing always that there will be a firm place to stand;
or else I will remember that I can fly!
Mandalas and Poetry by Alida
25 Jun 2017 Leave a comment
in Poetry Tags: aphorism, wisdom
When I get to the edge of all the light I know
I choose to take a step forward
Knowing always that there will be a firm place to stand;
or else I will remember that I can fly!
13 Jun 2017 Leave a comment
We have emotions. We feel. We have thoughts. We think. While it takes time to think, our feelings can happen in an instant. Nonetheless, our thoughts influence our feelings.
How does this work in those moments when our emotions seem to be creating discomfort for ourselves and those around us? Our first reaction comes from a feeling. The feeling comes from a thought, either a habitual, subconscious thought triggered in the moment, or a present thought which is interpreting the events of the moment through the filters of our beliefs. If the feeling is uncomfortable, we may be caught up in an unpleasant experience, and look for ways to discharge the discomfort, often playing out old patterns based on the coping skills of the infant or small child we once were.
We have the ability to interrupt our reaction however, by intentionally breathing, or using simple techniques such as counting to ten for example. This gives us the time to think consciously, to allow thought to catch up with the feeling. If we can induce even a small amount of relaxation in our bodies, we can stop the escalation generated by the chemicals of the emotion we are feeling, and thinking has a chance to proceed. We may even get caught up in the process of thinking, which, like a puzzle, exercises our minds. Sooner or later an idea will come that will appear to be a solution and then we are free to get busy again with doing what we want to, free from the discomfort of the emotion.
As soon as we relax, the physical feeling of anxiety, anger, frustration, or any uncomfortable emotion, can dissipate. We stop producing the fight or flight chemicals. After a few minutes, they begin to disappear from our blood, and the intensity of the feeling fades, freeing energy to be released which will facilitate problem-solving. This is an alternative to the negative commentary which commonly accompanies these emotions, whether self-criticism or blame of others, complaint or self-pity. An alternative gives the gift of choice, the freedom to choose our response instead of allowing it to be governed by the past.
One of the things we can think about is how to assert ourselves in the situation which has triggered the frustration, or other negative emotion. How can we assert our thoughts and feelings in such a way that they are likely to be received positively by another? When we can identify habitual or unconscious patterns in ourselves which repeat in similar situations, we can consider in what way this pattern serves us, or has served us in the past. We can identify whether it is in fact still serving us, or whether our more experienced self can create a new pattern which would yield more desirable, more comfortable consequences. If we find ourselves involuntarily repeating patterns, engaging in behavior which is leading to a negative outcome in our life, or in our relationships with others, we can consider whether it is making us feel more comfortable in some unconscious way. Often this will be the case. If we understand the need which is being met, we can think about how to meet that need in a more satisfying way, one which does not bring with it the undesired consequences. Even if we cannot understand the origin of the habitual pattern and how it has served us, we can still choose to think of a way to meet, to respond to, our current need that does not require engaging in behavior, physical, verbal or emotional, which results in negative consequences. What will bring us greater joy, freedom, and comfort in this moment, without doing harm to ourselves or others?
Another thing we can think about is the beliefs we hold which are biasing our interpretations of our circumstances in ways which generate these negative feelings. Where did these beliefs come from? Are they really ours, or were they instilled in us by others? Our beliefs can be changed, and this is the foundation of growing, evolving and adapting. We do not need to accept beliefs carved in stone by some person in our history. As adults, we do not need to rely on copying the beliefs of others. We have experience. We can form our own thoughts. We can find a balance between the thoughts that come from within ourselves to form beliefs and values, and the ideas that we incorporate from outside ourselves. Sometimes we may need to incorporate a new idea into our belief system and give it a high value precisely in order to find out what the consequences of that idea are when translated into behavior. We need to give ourselves freedom to experience and to decide on the validity of our chosen ideas based on our experiences. Once we know what a thought can generate in your life, then, and only then, are we in a position to decide whether to adopt it. Whatever we decide, we will feel good about the decision because we know that we are authentic in our reasons for the decision. We no longer need to look outward for permission because we have given ourselves permission.
We can learn to listen to ourselves, and to recognize when the words we are expressing are negative perceptions which will generate pain, such as saying “Now I’ll never get my desire met,” or positive perceptions which will hold open possibilities, such as saying “I missed it on that try, but I usually get it,” or “That’s okay, I’ll get it next time.” At different times, we may observe that we can feel very different ways about the same essential experience. Recognizing this can help us give ourselves permission to choose based on thoughts, not just feelings. Choice gives us freedom.
When we can stop our emotional reaction for long enough to allow our thinking part to observe, and to figure out another way to deal with the situation, when we can allow the solution to appear in its own time, we are better able to develop our ability to choose between the old patterns of reacting, and new, more effective patterns which are more true to our present self, our authentic self, and which get us results which bring us more comfort and joy, and which help us to maintain our health: physically, mentally, emotionally, socially and spiritually.
27 Dec 2015 1 Comment
At this, the darkest time of the year in Northern Alberta, I like to light up my life with LED, and prepare for new beginnings. I feel much like I imagine some of my plants feel, hunkered down in their pots, waiting for a taste of the sunshine that signals it is time to start growing again. Here in the dark, I keep warm and busily engaged in dreaming up my plans for the new year, and yes, observing what I accomplished this year, and contemplating what changes I might like to make to have an even more successful 2016. I have lots of time this week to reflect on all the changes that have happened over the years, an occupation made even easier by the internet. The fire is burning in my wood stove. My little hot tub is standing resolute at 40C, offering me respite from the chill outdoors. Life is good to me. May you, too, be warm and enjoy a season of respite as you prepare for the best year ever. Happy 2016!
14 Dec 2015 Leave a comment
04 Apr 2015 Leave a comment
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The Principle of Freedom to Choose
The natural laws which govern us are as exact as any others in Nature or in the physical world. As humans we may choose to act in accordance with these laws, or we may disregard them. The first great principle of life is choice. The outcomes of choice will always obey the laws of nature, whether or not we are aware of them. We may invent terms such as reward, punishment, luck and karma to explain the outcomes of our choices, but they would still occur whether we could explain them or not, because the universe is itself lawful.
The Principle of Balance
The most basic law which governs humankind is the law of balance. Whether we are struggling against gravity or contending with our inner nature, this law will prevail. Like the Yinyang symbol, all things in life have a corollary with which they stand in balance. Light and dark. Low and high. Sometimes we call these opposites, but they are more truly seen as elements which work together to create balance. The balancing elements for choice and freewill, for example, are responsibility and accountability.
The Principle of Consciousness
Humans are conscious beings. Consciousness is a faculty which exists in a natural state as the awareness we have been born with, but can be raised or developed through practise. We can react naturally, or choose our actions consciously, to the degree we have developed our awareness. To react without consciousness of the outcome will always generate whatever outcome is predicted by the intricate working out of the laws of nature and the universe. To act from consciousness allows us to be creative. Where there is no capacity to consciously choose there is no expectation of accountability. Nature will take its course. When we as conscious humans freely choose however, our creative acts bear responsibility. Accountability balances freedom.
The Laws of the Body
To understand the laws of the body, it is necessary only to observe the needs of the new-born. In those first few minutes of life after birth, the baby demonstrates its need for air, for sustenance, for movement, for contact, for rest and for cleansing. These are the basic physical needs of all humans.
The Need for Breathing
While we seldom think about it, because breathing is so automatic, as humans we need to breathe to live. Because breathing is so unconscious, we often are unaware of how well it is meeting our needs.
We need fresh air to breathe, with a good supply of oxygen, and as few toxins and particles as possible. Our bodies do alert us when oxygen is low, or toxins are dangerously high, but we have the ability to habituate to less than ideal circumstances, and many of us have been conditioned to ignore the messages our bodies send us. Modern cities and industry create environments where it is important to ensure that air quality is healthful. Indoor air is usually significantly more polluted than outdoor air.
To care for ourselves, the following guidelines are helpful:
The Need for Nourishment
We also need to eat to live, and we are usually quite attentive to this. Sometimes it may even appear that we live to eat! So many choices are available today that it can be challenging to know what, when and how much to consume. There are many groups with an interest in influencing our beliefs and our choices around food. Never before in history has eating wholesomely been such a challenge!
The principles of nourishment have not changed over time. Healthy bodies grow and develop only with natural, wholesome foods. To nourish ourselves effectively, the following guidelines are helpful:
All dietary imbalance will manifest as ill health. Excess sweets can manifest as diabetes and cardiovascular disease. Excess starch can manifest as colds, sinus trouble, constipation, and colitis. Excess protein can contribute to arthritis, rheumatism, joint disorders, skin disorders and eczema.
All conditions of ill health may point to an imbalance in nourishment.
The Need for Movement
In order to distribute and utilize the nourishment it receives, the body must be active. Movement, including circulation, is the only distributing agent of the body. Natural movement, including yoga, is preferable to artificial and repetitive movement. The following guidelines may be helpful:
The Need for Rest and Recovery
There are three ways in which our bodies recover from expending energy. These are rest, recreation and sleep.
Rest enables relaxation, and can be achieved through ceasing, reducing or changing our activity. Always stop what you are doing when you get tired. If the tiredness is specific to certain muscles, it may be possible to change positions, and continue. Continuing when tired is harmful. Rest by relaxing the whole body, or at least the part which is tired.
Recreation enables balance, through calling into action body parts which are not ordinarily used. Engage in amusing or expressive activity every day. Laughter is good exercise!
Sleep enables restoration and healing. While we sleep our bodies detoxify, alkalinize and carry out cell repairs. Sleep is also essential to healthy mental functioning. It is important during sleep to have periods of deep sleep and dreaming. Although busy schedules and external demands may cause us to compromise our need for sleep, our health depends on developing good sleep habits. The following guidelines may be helpful.
The Need for Hygiene
In nature, we are cleansed by the sun. Because we can’t always live in a climate where we can rely on the sun for natural cleansing, and so must wear clothes and live in artificial environments, we require bathing to eliminate wastes from our skin and to keep our pores open so they can perform their natural task of allowing for the outflow of unwanted salts, acids and toxins.
Our society abounds with myths about bacteria, and has invented an entire industry to deal with hygiene. Most hygiene products are unnecessary and potentially harmful because they are unnatural and filled with chemicals and preservatives. Antibacterial products are especially damaging because they interfere with the natural ecology of our skin, as it normally hosts a large number of beneficial bacteria which live in a symbiotic relationship with us. Destroying beneficial bacteria, inside or outside our body, opens the door for harmful bacteria and other organisms. The goal once again is balance.
For external cleansing, the following guidelines are helpful:
Internal Cleansing
Our digestive system is also filled with organisms which live harmoniously and in symbiosis with us. We want to maintain this healthy balance. Antibiotics quickly destroy this balance, and should be avoided unless their use is imperative, in which case the gut will need to be repopulated with healthy flora. The best food is of limited value in the absence of healthy gut flora and the enzymes they facilitate.
The following guidelines may be helpful:
27 Mar 2014 Leave a comment
The Story Of the Frozen Bat
As the snow flakes float across my windows on this early spring day, I take note of the little crocuses pushing up through the ground that lay exposed to the sun only a few days ago. I am hoping that the snow will give them a blanket, and that they won’t suffer damage from the plunging temperatures. I marvel that these little corms actually freeze in the ground, and still come forth in response to the sun’s rays with such eagerness.
Watching the snow, I remember the bat my father brought into our house one winter when we lived on the farm in northern Alberta. It was fearfully cold that day, at least forty below, and he had found the bat inside a hollow in a tree. He thought it was frozen solid, and indeed, when he picked it up, it was more rigid than an icicle. Thinking that his children had never seen a bat up close (Mom was terribly afraid of them), he decided to bring it home.
We children gathered around the kitchen table to poke and prod this fascinating brown ice cube. It was surely frozen; its little wings clapped tightly to its sides were immovable to the pressure of our fingers. We stroked its fur, and examined its tiny ears and beak. When we had satisfied our curiousity, we wandered away, as children will.
Sometime later, we heard a scream from the kitchen. It was our mother, and as we rushed to see, we discovered her standing on a chair with her hands covering her hair. Around her, in circles, flew a little brown bat. My eyes had to check the table to ascertain that it was the little brown ice cube come magically to life.
Eventually our father recaptured the tiny animal and took it out to the cow barn, where it could return to hibernation with somewhat less danger of freezing solid. Eventually, our mother forgave him for her distress. We children quietly shared the amazement of having witnessed natural cryogenesis, and learned a wonderful lesson about the resilience of life.
I hope my little crocuses are as resourceful! They at least are not warmblooded.
26 Mar 2014 Leave a comment
Such is the grandiosity of the human ego that it seeks to establish another’s truth on the basis of its own experience.
Alida Van Braeden 2008
25 Mar 2014 Leave a comment
In Alberta, the snow is slowly receding. In my yard small tracts of earth are emerging, and I open my imagination to the possibility of gardening again. In my journal I find these appropriate words:
Heart’s Garden
It seems I’ve spent my life weeding
This vast and unkempt garden
I thought was my heart,
Pulling weeds
Which always grow back
(or others like them)
to choke the flowers and fruits of my spirit.
Now I find a small plot of ground
Just big enough for me
Where I can transplant my Heart’s truest desires.
No weeds here, unless I bring them in
And if I do – well, then
I’ve learned another thing:
Weeds can be beautiful!
They flower, they fruit, they are edible
And sometimes
They are life giving medicine
For my Heart’s true garden.
21 Mar 2014 Leave a comment
Emerging from the last snow, a sure sign that Spring is arriving!
Here in Edmonton, Spring begins with a snowfall: Not quite enough to bring the skis back out, but enough to bring out the shovel. Beneath its spring blanket, the pine tree is not hiding its intention to thrust passionately into the new season!